Integrating Compassion with the Wisdom of God’s Word


The purpose of Aunt Dara’s Christian Advice Column is to glorify God by addressing human needs with compassion and the wisdom of God’s word.

Saturday, February 8, 2014

Her Family Doesn’t Like Her Church

Dear Aunt Dara,

For the past few months, I have been attending a new church.  The problem is that my husband is not a church-goer.  He says he doesn't like my church for various reasons, and he complains that "it’s too loud.”  Additionally, I have a 9-year-old little girl who gives me problems about attending church with me.  At times I have dragged her, unwillingly and in tears, to church with me.  On several occasions my husband has tried to intervene by telling me that she doesn’t have to go.  Isn’t it my job as a Christian and as a parent to try to raise my child in the church, or do you think she will come around on her own?

Frustrated Mom

Dear Frustrated Mom, 

Actually, it is both your job and your husband's job to raise your child in the church.   However, if this situation remains unchanged, you will succeed in turning your daughter against attending any church and you will have never won your husband.

As I read your letter, I question a few things.  First of all, what is your daughter's objection to attending church?  Is it just your new church that she doesn't want to go to?  If so, what is it that makes her so unhappy that she is in tears as she is being dragged there?  Secondly, is your new church the only church that your husband objects to?  Would he be more willing to attend a different church where it isn't as loud and he would have fewer objections to?  And lastly, since this is a new church for you, why do you continue to attend there when your husband obviously doesn't approve of that church and your daughter so desperately doesn't want to go there?

In the best interest of your family, talk to your husband and get his input into the church that he would be wiling to attend.  Then both of you can be united in being a good example to your daughter by taking her to church together.

God bless,
Aunt Dara