Dear Aunt Dara,
I think God is a holding a door open for me but I am not entirely sure. Being that I am new to the faith, I do not have many elders or others to consult with for biblical wisdom. Part of the reason I have not fully taken advantage of this door of opportunity is because my parents don't think that I should enter this door. I do not want to disobey them and more importantly I do not want to disobey the Lord. Both of them have told me that they do not think that I should pursue a passion of mine. For a long time I have tried explaining my passion to them, but they get upset or change the subject. My passion is not something that goes against the Bible; my parents and I simply have conflicting views on my career path. (Side note: I do not think that my parents have consulted the Lord in this matter. We see things differently theologically, and so that is the reason I have not asked them if they have done so or not.)
Yet, for some reason I keep getting this feeling that God wants me to take this opportunity. In fact, I think that this passion of mine may even be one of the reasons that He put me on this earth. For this reason, I have continued to pursue my passion. I am 23 years old, so I know that I am not a child, but I am in still living with my parents because I am a part time student finishing college. I am having trouble deciding whether I should just move out and pursue my passion. For months I having been praying about my situation. During this time, the Lord has strengthened my faith in Him. At first, it seemed as though my parents were right because things were not working out so that I could pursue my passion. But then there was a turning point that made me re-evaluate my situation. I believe that He has even allowed me to volunteer where I receive training for my passion. The woman in charge of the training facility has allowed me exchange my volunteer hours so that I do not have to pay for training at the facility. In other words, she allows me to volunteer to do odd jobs at her facility in exchange for free training. In the meantime, I was also blessed with a part time job in the food industry that has helped me pay my bills (although it's unrelated to my passion).
My parents have become increasingly persistent about me stopping my passion and pursuing a different path. But at the same time I have received more opportunities than ever to sharpen my skills for my passion. Moving out would probably upset my parents and other members of my family, but I would be able to pursue my passion. By the same token, moving out would create another large bill that could cause me to graduate college a little later, but financial challenges will increase my dependence upon God. Due to these opposing conditions, I am a little uncertain about whether God is opening the door or not? Any insights or scripture suggestions?
Thanks,
Standing at Welcome Mat
Dear Standing at the Welcome Mat,
You ask if God is opening a door for you. It’s often difficult to know if God is
leading you or if you are following your own desire. When we deeply desire something, it is very tempting
to try to do things to fulfill our desire.
However, the Bible says, “O Lord, I know the way of man is not in
himself; It is not in man who walks to direct his own steps” (Jeremiah 10:23). The Bible tells us that the Lord directs our
steps and we are not to lean on our own understanding (Proverbs 20:24, Proverbs
3:5-6). So, how do we know that the Lord
is directing our steps or if we are trying to direct our own way? By (1) consulting the Bible, (2) seeking
advice, and (3) examining the evidence. In
determining whether or not God wants you to take any course of action, the
first place to go is to the Bible. What
does the Bible say about the thing under consideration? Always follow what the Bible says! If the Bible doesn’t speak about the topic,
then seek godly advice from faithful, mature Christians and look at the
evidence before you. So, let’s look at
the evidence before you.
According to what you have written, the evidence that God wants you to pursue your passion is because you have been given the opportunity to receive free training for your passion in exchange for doing volunteer work. The only other evidence that you provide in support of pursuing your passion is that you keep getting a feeling that God wants you to take this opportunity. Personal feelings can never be presented as evidence of God’s will. The Bible says that the heart is deceitful above all things (Jeremiah 17:9).
In contrast, the evidences that God does not want you to
pursue you passion are:
1.
Your parents strongly disapprove.
2.
You would have to move out into your own housing.
3.
It would upset other family members.
4.
You would face financial challenges.
5.
It would delay your college graduation.
6. Your passion apparently is unrelated to the college degree that you are pursuing.
I have read your letter multiple times. One thing stands out very clearly. You refer to your passion 12 times, yet you do not specify what your passion is. This tells me that you either are ashamed of your passion, or you think that I will side with your parents if you tell me what it is. I know you said that your passion is not against the Bible, but I tend to think that perhaps it is. If it were not against the Bible, then why be so vague and why would your parents be so opposed to it? You said that you do not believe that your parents have consulted the Lord about your passion because you and your parents have different theological viewpoints. That also tells me that your parents believe that your passion is against the Bible. You said that they get upset when you try to talk to them about your passion and they have become increasingly more persistent about your stopping it. That tells me that they fear that your eternal salvation may be at risk if you continue to follow your passion. If that is the case, then your parents will NEVER support your choice to follow your passion. I do believe that your parents have prayed for you, many, many times. But their prayer is that you will have the wisdom to make the right decision. Wisdom listens to the counsel of parents (Proverbs 1:8).
I know this isn’t the answer that you were hoping you would
get from me, but my prayer and desire is that you make a wise decision based on
the Lord’s will and not your own will.
God bless,
Aunt Dara
