Waiting for God’s Timing

Part One 

Dear Aunt Dara,

I consider myself to be a fervent Christian.  I read my Bible and pray every day, and I try my best to do what's right, which is a hard thing to do for a 21-year-old in this day and age.  I have never been in a relationship with anyone, and it doesn’t help that some of my friends are in relationships.  I always pray for God to send me the right man, a Christian man who loves God, but it seems like the men who always like me are never Christians.  I'm reminded daily never to be in a relationship with someone who doesn't share the same beliefs as I do.  I am starting to feel confused, depressed, and extremely lonely!  Sometimes I think that maybe I will be single forever.  Am I doing something wrong?  What is it that I need to say or do for God to change my situation?

Sincerely,
Lonely Single 

Dear Lonely Single, 

No, you are not doing anything wrong.  In fact, you are doing everything correctly.  You are praying and trusting God to send you a Christian man who loves God.  Please be assured that God hears and is answering your prayers.  He is preparing the right man for you at this time, and when the time is right God will bring him into your life.  I repeat:  when the time is right God will bring him into your life.  I know you feel lonely and sad because God hasn't brought him into your life yet.  Trust God's timing.  Wait on the Lord.

God bless,
Aunt Dara 

Part Two 

Dear Aunt Dara, 

A couple of months ago I spoke to you about being alone.  Well now I have been confiding in a young man who seemed to be interested in me.  He is 28 years old and I am 22.  I feel at times he can be a very good friend to talk to and he listens to me, but there are times when he becomes very sexual toward me.  I know some men do not know how to express themselves toward women they like, but I feel as if he just wants sex with no strings attached.  He told me that when we met I looked like I could be sweet in bed and I looked like a down-to-earth person.  I like talking to him but it seems every time we talk the conversation somehow turns toward sex.  I asked him bluntly what exactly is it that he wants, and he told me he doesn't really know.  I thought at his age he would have some knowledge about what it is he wants in life, especially from a woman.  I remember you told me that God is preparing a man for me and he will soon come.  I don’t know why every time I decided to move on with my life and be happy being single another man tries to come in making me think he is serious about me.  Even before I was talking to him, there was another man who had the same agenda, and it wasn't until a week after I broke up with him that I met the guy I’m with now.  I feel hopeless thinking that all men just want sex before commitment because he is not the only man to do this to me. 

Sincerely,

Lonely Single 

Dear Lonely Single,

You must have misunderstood what I told you in my last response.  I did not tell you that the right man would soon be coming into your life.  I told you to trust God's timing and wait patiently on the Lord to bring the right man into your life when the time is right.  I don't know when that will be, and neither do you.  It may be next month, next year, or five years from now.  The point is, your loneliness makes you appear desperate for a man—any man—and therefore you become a magnet to the type of man who wants to use you for sex.  These men prey on lonely women who have a great need to find someone to love them.  In the beginning, these men will appear to be very supportive, loving, and charming until they have gained your trust, and then they will take advantage of you.  Unfortunately, it appears that the new man you have become involved with may be the type of man who wants you for sex.  How do I know?  Because that is what he has been talking about.

I would like to repeat what I said to you before:   

God is preparing the right man for you at this time, and when the time is right God will bring him into your life.  I repeat: when the time is right God will bring him into your life.  I know you feel lonely and sad because God hasn't brought him into your life yet.  Trust God's timing.  Wait on the Lord.  

Do not go out looking for someone to love you.  That's God's job.  When it's God's will, love will find you.  Stop looking for a man to love you and start loving God.  Let God fill your lonely heart, then you will become the type of woman who will be a magnet to a man who loves and obeys God.

God bless,
Aunt Dara